Clients often tell me: “I need to just sit down and write.”
This sounds reasonable, right? I mean, just DO IT!
But there’s something sort of punitive about this. The feeling I get is like being told to sit down and shut up. Be quiet. Toe the line.
Maybe it’s all my formative years in Catholic school with the nuns, but any kind of forcing or punitive vibe one my creating just doesn’t work. I can’t even use the word ‘discipline’ because it brings to mind punishment rather than focus. Dustpan spanking, anyone?
If you’re feeling stuck creatively and hear words in your head telling you what to do, and you’re not following that voice, perhaps it’s because the vibe is more of a punishment than an invitation. I mean, really. Who wants to be told to sit down and do anything, even if it is our own voice?
It may be that sitting down to write is not your style. Perhaps standing and jamming on the keyboard Tori Amos style would be better for you. Or bouncing on a big ball along with your typing.
But, honestly, most of the tips and hacks for getting our work done avoid the real issue. We’re scared. It’s scary to write our truth. It’s daunting to invent worlds and inhabit them with characters we will care about. It’s scary as hell to ‘put ourselves out there’.
What works for me and my clients is to make a commitment. And honor it. And honor our own way of doing things. If writing in the cafe works for you, do it. If writing standing up makes it easier to be with the discomfort, do it.
I invite you to bring pleasure to the process, not punishment. What delights you and your inner writer or artist? Maybe you ‘reward’ yourself after creating. Maybe you sip the cappuccino while you create.
I’m working on a writing project – NOT a book – that is daunting as hell. So I bring extra compassion and kindness. This does not mean bailing on my writing dates. It does not meaning skipping writing when I don’t ‘feel like it’. (We usually never feel like it.) It means showing up for writing dates in ways that help me focus, follow through and finish – in my way.
This approach to creating is the very foundation of my work as a coach. We each have to find the process that works for us. Take all suggestions and ’tips’ that work for you and adapt them for yourself. Make up your own crazy rituals. And if a dustpan spanking works to get your work done, well, more power to you.
Whatever your rituals for making, make them work for you. Don’t bully yourself into it; you will just rebel against the meanness. As well you should.
What pleasures help you to get your creative work done? Share what works for you below!
Although I am a visual artist I actually enjoy writing! However, I can’t accomplish every writing task with exactly the same process. It seems that I can write D’var Torah and philosophy easily at home on my desktop or in a notebook. But when it comes to writing for my individual works of art, I get more and better writing done at a coffee shop. It’s a different intensity I suppose. Or maybe just an excuse to go out and get a “Moon Rise Latte.”
That’s so good to know what types of writing need what venue. I love that you know that, Patricia!
just a comment about the punitive aspect of the ‘just do it!’ advice for our writing. Oh this resonated. That won’t work for me, either. The notion we can all follow the ‘just sit your butt in the chair and do it’ and we’ll be successful is very shaming. The underlying message is if you don’t do it this way or can’t it obviously means you aren’t a writer, don’t want it bad enough and you won’t make it!’ This punitive and shaming vibe is very negative.
Yes! You’re right, punishment and shaming don’t work. We can see how well that goes…all those years of that approach in the Catholic school have filled many a therapist’s pocket. I’m not trying to single out the Catholics; there are plenty of other institutions, religious and otherwise, that do this. That was just the flavor I was given. Thank you nuns!
I commented on FB that I completely get this as I have made my own schedule since 2001 and it took a long time to come to terms with it. Sometimes, once I’ve taken a nice walk, had breakfast, gotten a shower, etc… it’s 10:30, 11 am but the time I sit down…. and yes, I still sometimes feel a little guilty about that. But I think that we likely get just as much done as our 9-5 office-dwelling brethren. I know that when I worked in an office setting I was not productive each and every one of those 8 hours. You can’t be.
And, as for the feeling like we’re putting too much pressure on ourselves to “sit down and get busy”, I was reminded of one of my favorite quotes: “Inspiration exists, but it has to find you working.”
BJ,
You are so right that we probably get as much done on our own as someone in a 9-5. It really is about knowing, liking and trusting your process.
So glad you are at home in your process! Keep making art!